I started blogging over a year ago. I became more consistent with it back in February. My previous blog, Literary Fierceness (formerly known as The Journey of An Authoress), was mainly about the writing process, tips, and encouragement. I had a good gathering of followers, mainly other aspiring writers. It was great, we supported each other in our efforts to cross that bridge from “aspiring” to “published”.
I revamped the blog to concentrate more on building a platform and establish my brand. But even after the relaunch, I struggled with my writing. I started having moments of personal reflection. And during that period, I wasn’t able to blog like I should. I felt that my direction was wrong, so I stopped rather than continue down the wrong path. I went off the grid. Incognito. MIA. One friend says that I hid out in a cave.
In regards to my writing aspirations, I knew the talent was there, I tried to stay on top of industry knowledge, I set up my blog and social media accounts to build this platform. I even have a novel and novella under my belt. Many people were aware of my WIP (work in progress) entitled Wild Oats. This project has been in development for years. Actually, like some Hollywood scripts/projects that are stalled, my story has been in Development Hell. It felt all my effort was for naught because every step forward I took, I got knocked back several. My novel’s release had been pushed back an embarrassing number of times. So, I took my issues to God and waited for an answer.
After some time, this is what was revealed to me about the novel:
“Be original. This story’s been told already.”
And I’m like, “Okay, but I’ve been working on this story for years! I’ve invested time and money on this novel. I have a cover for crying out loud. Do I just toss out all those years of work and go back to the drawing board?”
Again, “Be original.”
So, I thought about it further and I had to admit that my novel was feeling like a combo of a few of favorite TV shows: “Sex and the city”, “Girlfriends”, and “Single Ladies”. I had identified chick-lit as the genre and my writing steered in that direction. So, if chick-lit isn’t my thing and all the themes that lie therein, then what should I be writing?
“Who said you had to be in a box? Be original.”
So what does it mean for the story “I” had deemed to be my breakout? I really don’t know. It hasn’t been revealed yet. But I recognize that “I” was trying to force it through.
As I continued to meditate, I realize that my proudest and most humbling moments are when something I’ve written has encouraged, motivated, empowered, or inspired someone. Perhaps with my novel, I have focused too much on the (mis)adventures of my MC (main character), the jokes, the shoes, the drinking, and yes, the sex, instead of what the core of what the story was about. What initially motivated me to even write the story to begin with. Healing a broken heart. Or, how do you mend a broken heart? (I know, that’s Al Green)
So, I find myself at an impasse. I can put this story in a vault, never to be seen or heard from again. Or just set it aside for awhile as I have a few other ideas that could not only entertain, but also do those aforementioned things and return to the story once it has been revealed how it shall be told. Or do I wait?
Decisions, decisions…but I think that just may have been my problem all this time. I felt the need to hurry and make a choice. So this time I won’t force it. I will be patient.